A Play in Bed

    Hello beautiful Dancer of the Night
    They are flowers laying their brighter wings
    A Beautiful Silence comes when their mouths lay
    He slides down whispering to her tunnel of voice
    She breathes heavily listening to what he touches
    With eyes closed only laughter is among their rescue
    His adventurous hands is used as a comb
    His curious hands is used for her beautiful support
    She walks her fingers to his chamber lair
    His mouth touches her sun and her mountains
    She reveals a dancing smile while gripping his pride
    Her mountains are often left with compliments
    His ambitious mission is to build her heat
    Their lips are often soft and often approached
    Writing and acting in their own world
    They begin to dance very playfully
    With giggles and smiles like a musical play
    Her mouths both speak of heavily breathing
    He gently pushes for her silent praise
    She strums him like a beautiful guitar
    He writes on her little sisters a poem
    She writes inspiration on his tower
    He sings loudly and gently in her safe
    These flowers laugh and tickle one another
    He whispers “Hello my Beautiful Dancer”

Her name was Sylvia, Sylvia Salvia.

Sylvia Salvia. The terror in her introduction has infected this monkey with intense experience, in some sense of fear for the next time this experience should ever be done. Not far away, four monkeys embarked in their own journey in a small hut with metal furniture as surroundings for theater. I’ve decided to meet this notoriously known herb, for which she introduced herself violently for the first 10 seconds, and slowly she caressed me no better than any woman has ever had.

The beginning was a simple hello to a dark shaped tea herbs and I started to wonder, “Would this make me feel healthy instead of the simple plain standby feel?” The look was however, very deceiving. She’s probably the worst looking herbal prostitute, and the taste is like kissing a woman who brushed her teeth using nothing but rotten garlic.

And after this very first experience with Sylvia Salvia, she made sure I remembered her well.

After a brief session of what Sylvia’s potential political torture, it was advised not to speak, move, lean and laugh. For which neither, did I not fully take into consideration and let insanity does its best to me.

Sylvia Salvia, once you burn her in this special made pipe with a distracting red flashing light around it, you think nothing about what you’re about to inhale and you let your guard down with this powerful sense of herb. After kissing her, it kicks you without hesitation regardless of how powerful this shield you are protecting yourself with. Know this, Sylvia is strong enough to penetrate this god damn shield. Leaving me, with 10 seconds of the worst trip of my life.

The feel of it?

Your mind suddenly leans to one side. My theory for now, if you’re right handed you will lean to your right side. Its simply unexplainable. I started to feel more than what a usual monkey would feel. I felt as if there was a nearby magnet, pulling my mind towards it. Panic! I stood up, walked out from that hut with metal furniture desperately wanting to ask “Sylvia, What have you done to me?”. I walked and ran to where this right side of energy is pulling me into. The other monkey’s panic with this sight and asked me to come back in and sit down. This strong magnetic standby however, felt like it was like as if some actual chimpanzee spiked your drink just to get in your pants. I strike fear on a fellow monkey who has not tried Sylvia. The look on his face was never the same of how he would most likely resort into the same Standby room.

The company of Pink Floyd’s ‘Us and Them”, reached its peak and this is where your mind is left vulnerable. Mary Jane was never like this, she was chilled and allowed us to multitask with peace in the Standby room. Sylvia, simply did not believe in foreplay. She calms you down for awhile after stepping on your mind, and you slowly start to endure and sit tight. After Pink Floyd was done, the chaotic Lou Reed’s “satellite of love” started to peak as well. Leaving your mind fully focused on this unorthodox self discovery path. Paranoia. My advice:

Don’t ever put on Radiohead when you meet Sylvia, she will make sure you understand their lyrics

Of course it all depends on individuality. If you believe in many things, these many things will most likely appear in front of you. Sylvia Salvia is a psycho active herb that will make you actually see, what a jungle your mind is. The possible creatures never seen before could only exist in this imaginative mind of yours and to truly know how to get there, is not by standby, only Sylvia could show you the way.

She finishes you off in just half an hour or less. But remember, because of her, she has officially formed a strange living thing in your mind, knocking your inner skull till it hurts. The trick is, just like Mary Jane, never ever fight it. Once you inhale it, let it conquer you. Don’t even put an armour up to defend yourself. She’ll come in with the biggest bull no matter what colour cape you put in front of it, it will ram you down. Caress Sylvia and she will slide herself on your skin comfortably. With Mary Jane, its easy to fight her and its not painful because she knocks your door before entering. Sylvia, is just not your average herb.

However, sobering down with Velvet Underground’s “Venus in furs’, the world started going at its normal pace. You start remembering where you are in the first place. And slowly, you see Sylvia walking away with a smile knowing, that you will not see her for the longest time. I however, would want to see her again once in every reasonable amount of months.

Or maybe soon…

Open your mind

Bitch please

The frustration towards women of how men expects a very extreme sense of slavery from them, is simply unbearable.

The rights they fight for, should exactly be how the hippies were united regardless of their genders to fight against war in Vietnam. Women politicians and corporate executives are slowly gaining up to its par with men when it comes to survival to the fittest. The dreadful threat that men face is the appalling idea that a woman, could lead a country. Its practically watching ignorant versus ignorant female edition.

Continue reading

The Standby Room

The trip to this room is awfully tricky. You stumble for a bit and hit a rough patch as if hitting your leg on furniture in a dark room. It’s mentally spinning but the stairs leads you to a peaceful ambiance, possibly defined as the 7th layer of heaven. You may have achieved such stature by just flying on your own airlines by smoke, inhaling and letting go. The next thing you know, you’re in this very comfortable room, and it is called, The Standby Room

The vanity of this room is that it is controversially comfortable that even god was amazed of the strong peace bond that happens in this room. The name Standby alone already means a pause of time, unpleasant times, hatred and other negative energies all eventually destroyed.

A room with intimate bond between apes and monkeys jumping about, in their own definition of what the room is; The standby room basically defines your absolute comfort zone. It is a room spent only with your favourite and inspiring apes with laughter within mindless and actual funny scenes, wisdom that makes sense now or years to come and the value of presence in the people you love most. Its an empty room with the usual seats of your imaginative preferences of how the room would look like.

Personally, once the weed kicks in, the trip to the room is usually a slight chaos but comfortable once you sit down facing your familiar lovable faces. The room is strictly in your preference.

For me however, I have always imagined a dark dimmed red room with comfortable seats. The scene changes from time to time on mood if someone takes a guitar and play or when we have role plays and even hardcore laughing so genuine, that you forget the reality location that you were in.

Where ever you maybe, as long as you are under the influence of this intoxicating effect, regardless if it’s at Wendy’s Fast food, Mc Donalds, A car, even in your best friend’s room, this IMAGINATIVE room usually is what you see, feel and breathe.

The room doesn’t have to be luxurious, just seats and depending in where you are, the music, movies and many other items need to be used during Standby, will be the decoration of the room.

My Ambition Standby Room

Standby Room (Munchies)

This is one of my rough ideas of a standby room, especially when its a gathering filled with a high case of munchies. This is how I would imagine the ambiance of when the whole lot of monkeys would gather in their own seats eating their foods with delight, relaxed and feel so belonged that even the rest would not be ashamed of dreaming about their freedom while munching. Although, it is not THAT luxurious as the picture above, imagine something more humble.

The Standby Room (Artistic)

This standby room, is mainly when the self claim artistic side that conquers your mind with inspiring music if someone plays the guitar and sings, writes a story and even paint a picture of different definition of peace. You would listen, observe and speak to your much adored monkeys in the most non provoking manner that inspiration is your comfortable couch, the beautiful soothing feel when you close your eyes and feel vulnerably inspired.

Standby Room (Social Seats)

This room, in my preferences defines the ultimate social gathering room. The profound explanation of the Standby Room where you sit closely to your much unforgettable partners and share laughter, wisdom, enjoying the ridiculous fun games and even the artistic measure is portrayed even closely here as well. (Keep in mind that these rooms are ROUGHLY the idea of a my preferences as a standby room design.)

The concept is an available room with the usual seats when this gathering trip occurs and the usual seats among those you love, are already set in mind. This is the best room for me, the chill out room that feels also like a lounge but the aura and priceless history created here with your monkeys is forever within these fictional walls.

Waking the subconscious

Other than the Standby rooms that is roughly projected in the pictures above, the term Standby is mainly pausing in time. Letting the world wait while you’re fun is far from over. The beautiful journey of triggering your hidden poetic opinions into a simple flow of definitions. You’re desire for peace is greater, and your creativity of wit and even nonsensical humour would appeal well.

It proves quotes like “time flies by when you’re having fun” completely wrong. It brings the best out of you, and perhaps maybe accept that perfection is not the main theme we chase, but the thrill and moments with your buddies during Standby, is utterly profound. It can be shameful when they’re seats are cold, the possible inspiration may not be there, but in spirit and hope, it cannot be broken, this powerful bond.

The downfall of the Standby room however, although you maybe in complete standby with those who ventured to the room with you, but those who are completely sober, are the ones who can painfully drag you back into this ugly paradox of reality. Where time travels in a normal pace, and the ugly world looks at you in the eye. Although these sober people maybe in the room with you in reality, they are actually this white noise similar to an interrupted signal that their presence in the Standby Room is still invisible. Sobering up, makes your friends disappear too and you’re no longer in either of your ‘rooms’.

Going Standby

In the left world of works and pain. What forces our ethics and conscience to sleep, the freedom that we cannot fight for, is emotionally unleashed when you’re on standby. I quote John Lennon

“A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.”

The standby room is a reality to give. Becoming our reality. Becoming our right world of love and peace. It’s not an escape pod, its us dreaming when we’re awake. Its peace when the world is at war. Its us breaking this cage with our self grown wings of freedom.

Men, Women, and Legal comedy.

No relevance. but cows are plain amusing.

The one about the dad…

A man was wandering around a fairground and he happened to see a fortune-teller’s tent. Thinking it would be good for a laugh, he went inside and sat down.
‘Ah…..’ said the woman as she gazed into her crystal ball. ‘I see you are the father of two children.’
‘That’s what you think,’ said the man scornfully. ‘I’m the father of THREE children.’
The woman grinned and said, ‘That’s what YOU think.’

About women:

Women think they already know everything, but wait… training courses are now available for women on the following subjects:

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before

2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits

3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits

4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After The Game

5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.

6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His

7. Communication Skills I: Tears – The Last Resort, not the First

8. Communication Skills II : Thinking Before Speaking

9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging

10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire

About men:

An English professor wrote the words, ‘Woman without her man is nothing’ on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly.

The man wrote: ‘Woman, without her man, is nothing.’

The woman wrote: ‘Woman: Without her, man is nothing.’

And For the Lawyers…

Recently reported in the Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyers Journal, the following are 22 questions actually asked of witnesses by attorneys during trials and, in certain cases, the responses given by insightful witnesses:

1. “Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?”

2. “The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?”

3. “Were you present when your picture was taken?”

4. “Were you alone or by yourself?”

5. “Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?”

6. “Did he kill you?”

7. “How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?”

8. “You were there until the time you left, is that true?”

9. “How many times have you committed suicide?”

10. Q: “So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?”
A: “Yes.”
Q: “And what were you doing at that time?”

11. Q: “She had three children, right?”
A: “Yes.”
Q: “How many were boys?”
A: “None.”
Q: “Were there any girls?”

12. Q: “You say the stairs went down to the basement?”
A: “Yes.”
Q: “And these stairs, did they go up also?”

13. Q: “Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn’t you?”
A: “I went to Europe, Sir.”
Q: “And you took your new wife?”

14. Q: “How was your first marriage terminated?”
A: “By death.”
Q: “And by who’s death was it terminated?”

15. Q: “Can you describe the individual?”
A: “He was about medium height and had a beard.”
Q: “Was this a male, or a female?”

16. Q: “Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?”
A: “No, this is how I dress when I go to work.”

17. Q: “Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?”
A: “All my autopsies are performed on dead people.”

18. Q: “All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?”
A: “Oral.”

19. Q: “Do you recall the time that you examined the body?”
A: “The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m..”
Q: “And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?”
A: “No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.”

20. Q: “You were not shot in the fracas?”
A: “No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel.”

21. Q: “Are you qualified to give a urine sample?”
A: “I have been since early childhood.”

22. Q: “Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?”

A: “No.”
Q: “Did you check for blood pressure?”
A: “No.”
Q: “Did you check for breathing?”
A: “No.”
Q: “So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?”
A: “No.”
Q: “How can you be so sure, Doctor?”
A: “Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.”
Q: “But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?”
A: “It is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere.

A man was wandering around a fairground and he happened to see a fortune-teller’s tent. Thinking it would be good for a laugh, he went inside and sat down.
‘Ah…..’ said the woman as she gazed into her crystal ball. ‘I see you are the father of two children.’
‘That’s what you think,’ said the man scornfully. ‘I’m the father of THREE children.’
The woman grinned and said, ‘That’s what YOU think.’

Peace is Sold

Peace at War

War at Peace. Peace at War

Watch the horses run towards the finish line

For your protector of arms will not be too kind

Careful when running for you might break a bone

It ends your freedom of marathon into a silent tone

Now run and keep running till you can buy you own

Don’t look back when you’ve seen the fires all grown

The slot machines called peace has gone out of hand

To the power disease only held by women and men

Go ahead and stop for the children crying with a scar

Please you should hurry for they are not that far

Otherwise their spells will form your smiling thought

Into a raging human with no fear of what love has fought

For even cancer may be the cure for that pain

For even bullets are no longer a fear again

They are tired of piercing through our brothers

They are tired of ending the lives of daughters

How is the pessimist going to conquer us this time

How is the optimist comforting us during his climb

Will they use a peace symbol to start a war soon?

Or will a gun bring us peace by noon?

Remakes approved for States!

The evaluation of certain copies and remakes of movies, television series and even game shows are often depicted in our society in Malaysia. It is often either stepped on or being spat on when you see such remakes of these ‘original’ tv series that was made into our own definition. The obvious evaluation is not only circulating around the fact that it is unoriginal, but it formulates the minds of the locals believing that the original concept has been made contact with perhaps an inner depth of hate towards your own race, country and even the slang could even throw you off the balcony.

Take example, American Idol (although concept not originally from them), everyone started depicting their series. Malaysian Idol was one. Have you taken notice of the disgust the high life of society expresses that it was unoriginal therefore disgusting perhaps? Main reason of why the locals would shout “down with copying American series” is mainly this small ball of creature with fur in their black hearts believing that their own country should never depict anything from the states, or even the original series that came from European countries.

Is it just me or are the current South East Asian crowd of civilians just worship the daylights of the western concept of life? It’s either these western crowd get rejected politely or worshiped as a god for coming up with great idea’s of a series. Have we South East Asians been kneeling down all this while, or is this just a young naive mid 20’s or younger crowd who believes in such pathway. What have we to become? What is this invisible ray of shield that cannot be seen by these cold-blooded lizards who claims these Original series not only should they not be depicted, but never be made by the local effort. Never be touched, and never be spoken by their native tongue.

Now I ask you before I commence verbal violence to your windows 95 mindset, The Americans have made countless of remakes and somewhat, I ask you now, is that better than what we’re doing? I could never forgive the fact that they made ‘REC’ an original Spanish series into their own which was called “Quarantine”. It’s not a disgust feel, it’s just that the world should know that them Spaniards could think of such great idea’s even by themselves. Weren’t we all sick when they made their own versions of The Grudge, The Eye and many other countless Japanese Horror Movies?

American (Remake)

Spanish Version (Original)

Weren’t some of us became sick to the stomach just watching such horrendous actions? I personally never cared despite the exact emotion description of seeing one, but the main attacking point for me right here, is the bias thoughts by wealthy upper class lizards who feels that our permission to follow what the western did, is simply disgusting but it is perfectly fine for them to copy others.

Here’s my verbal machine gun, fuck your swimming skills and get out of that shallow pool of yours. Support our local scene with an open door. Don’t just shoot without reasoning. I’ve stayed in Italy for a month which is long enough to see that they even THEY have their own Doraemon dubbed in Italian. But these slimes feels that it doesn’t sooth any of their pain to hear a Malay version of it?

Cut off your tongue and donate it to the ‘Kneel and suck their dicks’ association. I would kill just to see Chairman Mao, conveying the spirit of Asia’s best minds, and lead a revolution due to us just remaking a version of our own, was simply brushed aside when it is PERFECTLY FINE that the west is doing such as well.

You might as well set fire to your house and not allow any local fireman to save your ass. Then we’ll see what Cliche REALLY means!

Here’s some medical healing liquor for you, who cares if Asia’s got their own Amazing Race or The biggest Loser. Its not original but hey, it gives us Asian an equal chance to compete physically and push ourselves, just like how anyone else could! Stop building a self-righteous block of walls to convince yourself that we Malaysian’s aren’t original. To be fair, your complain about it is obviously not original too! It’s probably passed on by some other leech far down the gallops of ignorance, simply too fond of themselves to even care about their benefits here. Between the west and the east, we’re no better, neither are they. We’re equally fucked up and equally charmed under the same exact sun.

Why stay under the shade where most of the shit idea’s literally flushed out from the toilet bowl, are where them lizards would be camping. They’re just too familiar with the smell and rather bath themselves around it that’s why.

Don’t go too far when you’re bitching about your country following a series that has been created. Trust me, we’re not alone. A lot of countries do that too, even self proclaim masters of the world countries does remake from others too.

It would really sadden me though, like a fingernail being plucked out slowly by the weakest person on earth, if this were to be made into a replica of their own: REC 2

So you think you CAN lie?

The individuals in this world rely too much on what they have and too shy or ashamed to admit what they do not have. If you’re the type person who tries to think their way through about a lie, you’re a common person. Trust me, everyone tries to be that. It’s either that, or you’re just this liar who lies based on emotions. There are two types of liars I can positively say;

One being a liar who focus on their words, situations and what would be wise to say based on how a character would rather believe it. They think only HOW to make this person or target, to believe every word. This falls into the category of Artistic liars. Do not be fooled by the category, it’s still not a compliment.

Two, being one individual who chooses to lie ignorantly, only wanting the listener to think of an individual as a cool, badass or a god to some level. This is because they don’t care about their choices of words or tone of voice, they only speak with their heart which generally results into almost ANYONE, seeing you coming from a hundred miles away. This category however, are Autistic Liars! Do not take the word autistic wrongly as I am not making fun of any disability of  a human being. I just fairly believe that people who suffers from autism should be called people seeing that they are genuinely honest people. However people who lies in an obvious manner without thinking with some unnatural sense of stupidity, are more deserving to be called autistic.

Autistic liars

These two common attributes as a liar. A common lie generally starts from not wanting to look like you know nothing, here is a very bad example;

Aizat : Hey dude, have you heard of this book called ‘A Step away from heaven? (Not real book)

Amir: Yes, of course. erm, its by that writer.. ah I forgot his name. ( all lies)

Aizat: Smirnoff Robert (not an actual person)

Amir: Yup that’s the one (another lie)

Bare in mind, this example may seem very futile however there is no companion of tone of voice to make it sound credible.

Tip: You could wait for him to guess and not help him with the name at all. Just let him guess. In fact, tell him/her that you know who it is but you just want to see if they know.

However

EVERY MOTHER FUCKER does this, or at least they have done this before. It’s a basic lie in preventing that you don’t want to sound like you don’t know anything and wanting to sound smart. Well guess what, everyone does it because we’re egoistic cunts!

However, if you’re aware of your actions, you’re one step closer in becoming a completely honest person. The best part is, if you’re aware of yourself doing it, you’re aware when others do it. You just recognized the pattern oh so well.

An emotional compulsive liar, usually doesn’t get far. They think its believable to others mostly because people choose to just keep quiet about it and just listen. Of course me, I do admit, I had my horrible compulsive liar days but after learning the fine master art in honesty and being humble in what you know, you’re in another top of a game to piss people off.

Please remind yourself, if you think you’re easily conquered emotionally such as updating facebook status and put your angry bad ass scolding statements for a desperate cover up of your wrong doings OR even if you cannot accept mistakes of your own because you trust your judgement of character and no one elses,  you’re bound to be a horrible liar. People can see right through you. Its a whole different level of Self-righteous people, its an extreme one. Personally, its easy to read them, its better to press their buttons due to obvious surface.

Why do you think it wasn’t fun for me anymore? I think its called growing up

Artistic liars

The dangerous part among the smart compulsive liars, is the art of it. The art is simple, jumble up your lies with some actual truth. Here is another bad example:

Amir: Hey dude, do you have some ciggies left?

Ariff: I do but I actually have 2 left man and I’d like to have it all. (The truth is that there are ciggies, but there’s actually 6 and you want them all to yourself)

In a way, this will result the person who asks, to not check and therefore believes this lie.

Among the best lies, are basically mixing with logical well research knowledge, with the lie

A clearly bad example:

A story about how you went clubbing last night and probably boned a chick.

Now to make this true, the premise of the story is there, but how you tell it has to be logical, some sense of reject and shame towards you only implies that “someone who shares a mistake has a sense of humour about themselves”

“Dude, last night was so embarrassing man, I got rejected by this chick who looks horribly pretty but she turned me down, however her friend, well she was quite hot and she was a little noisy in her personality, but what the hell I was drunk man, and I’m sure she was too so we kinda made out and we went over her place and did stuff. I mean she had to be drunk anyways cause we woke up hours later and we kinda felt awkward and fuck it was bad”

That CAN be potentially fall into a beautiful lie especially if this never happened. But in those words and proper tone of voice, anyone could pull that off. Yes, ANYONE.

Some people, would go to an extend of MAKING the lie true. In fact, prime example was my Korean Fencing Coach. He wanted to skip a meeting among the Malaysian Korean Sports association due to personal reasons telling that he will be heading to Johor Baru to check on some available lands. The only lie about that sentence, is that he never planned to go, but the available land at Johor are true. So by making sure that the lie stays intact, he buys himself  a bus ticket to Johor eventually so thus, making the lie, a complete truth.

Corrupted liars

Ignorant bad liars, usually rely on their own imaginative world. What they strictly irrationally believe, is what you will hear. Sometimes you would hear a man saying that he knows a big time drug dealer who is not afraid of smoking grass in public in front of cops in Malaysia, and his name is Mouse, Curly or Evo Yes I have heard them all. He/she claims that [Insert name here]  is his/her good friend, of course when you ask him what is their real name, they just simple say that they have no clue of their good friends name and says how nicknames are often the ones you remember. Tsk.

Desperate Liars

Liars never know when to back down. They swear either in gods name when people truly do not believe them even when its obvious that the lie is already floating on water. This is when they’re desperate. God must be proud of us.

“God must LOVE stupid people, he made so many”

The most common of liars getting caught, are usually the ones who lie to get sympathy. Its the whole I have been beaten up, I have been bullied till I bled and yes, some even crossed the point where they say they have cancer. These are also common liars and I will forgive you if you behave that way when you’re still in high school, but not when you’re in your late 20’s up to the age when you’re a parent of 5 children.

Of course there are people who desperately cover their tracks by maybe TRYING TOO HARD to convince good friends or even NOT closest friends via status updates, bitching without giving that person a chance to speak and listen to their opinions. Its true, its not always a lie. It could however either be you’re lying desperately OR you’re just emotionally unstable which is another different topic to talk about.

Tip: Always think of your sentence and logic without any religious or spiritual guidance to lie. It never works. As I said before, lying with emotions never works.

Sometimes, the most random and unthinkable made up event could suffice. Example: I came back home very late once, way past the time my parents wanted me home which was 3. I came back around 5 instead and I was preparing what sort of excuse to make my mother believe me. I took off my boxers and pour water all over it and went home facing my mom. Before she could even say anything, all I said was I shat in my pants and I was washing this thoroughly to kill the smell.

She believed me fully and excused me. Ooo Rah!

Honesty, the best and horrifying weapon of all

I am not encouraging liars to learn how to lie. Please do bare in mind, if you lie too much and when you get caught, Yes, WHEN you get caught. People will always remember, if you are able to lie to a good friend, she/he could always lie to you as a best friend as well. Yes, we all lie to our parents about many things and it usually starts from there. You start off by coming up with a believable lie with them, and slowly you start putting it on your own friends who would run in a burning building for you. Do not get addicted to it, or else you’ll just be one of those typical compulsive lying uncles/aunties in the late future and create stories for reputation sake, slowly building lies to cover up another lie, and it goes completely out of control. No one can be a Mr Ripley, and if can, you had better not have any friends.

Never once think that you can make a living tool for the rest of your life lying, you will waste a great fortune of living itself.

Why I say honesty is the best answer? Because you’re one of a kind walking on earth if you are able to say that you genuinely do not understand or have no knowledge of what a person is talking about, that shows you want to learn about it and by asking that, you can always argue or debate to win another day. Honesty can make you patient as well, trust me. It makes you humble. You know when elder people look down on you based on seniority? Don’t be pissed off and bullshit your way through just to win an argument with them. They can see it from a mile away and the more they will label you as a typical rebellious kid. In fact, take pleasure in knowing that it angers you. It proves their point. We do not want to be typical. We want to be remembered! We want them to feel threatened of our sincerity in our honest opinions and able to say a respond with no sarcasm, smart ass remarks or even lies to just win an argument.

We want them to fear the feel of envious to a much younger person than they are.

“If you’re a compulsive liar at the age of 20, its normal. But if you’re still a compulsive liar when you’re 50, its a shameful breed of human beings”

Take advantage of that! That is how you can beat the system.

So it comes back to the main topic, so you think you can lie?

Read between the lines.

Read between the lines

This is a message to you compulsive liars, liars and retired liars. Especially the ones who think they never got caught. Trust me, you’re probably listed as a liar already. People are just nice enough to not say shit to shame you.

Lying is like shooting a gun. You always think once you have the gun, you can shoot them. They are thinking the exact same things about you. If you can catch others to lie, they are probably doing the same shit to you.

Obviously you could or should not feel that a hairy tailed living creature as myself doesn’t lie anymore. That would be a lie. Its only human anyways, but just a view of how a human mind could stretch in some extreme just like religion and political views.

Lets not create varieties of colourful lies. A white lie could already paint the colour of chaos.

Hope to never get caught - possible true meaning